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Director: Andy Palmer
Starring: Jere Burns, Scottie Thompson, Clint Howard, Courtney Gaines, and Robert Englund

For years there have been urban legends or hoax stories on Halloween scare house murders. These stories have heightened the spooks and thrills associated with attending these venues every Halloween. Imagine yourself walking through a haunted house and someone is really getting murdered before your eyes, but you think its all part of the at-traction. Now picture that you are the one getting murdered in this attraction. Sounds like a great plot for a movie, THE FUNHOUSE MASSACRE.

The Movie

Made in 2015, with the tag-line “Murder is all part of the show”, THE FUNHOUSE MASSACRE is the story of a group of serial killers who escape an insane asylum, and take over a halloween funhouse dedicated to their individual serial murders. Each killer has their sadistic hobbies, ranging from cult suicides to cooking human flesh, and they are determined to turn this funhouse into their most remembered work yet. It all takes place on Halloween night, when a group of young unsuspecting patrons attend this fun-house and soon discover that as the patrons to this sadistic carnival that they are part of the show.

The movie opens with the warden of the asylum (Robert Englund) showing an ap-parent case worker around the asylum, little did he know that this was part of the escape plan, by Mental Manny leader of the killers. The warden gets murdered by the case worker who turns out to be Mental Manny’s little prodigy, a crazy clown girl thats likes to stitch her victims shut. Basically a D-list version of Harley Quinn.

Next we get introduced to a sherif and her dumb*ss of a deputy investigating a murder of a columnist writing about the serial killers. She was found in her hotel with her eyes and mouth stitched together. Hmmmmm I wonder who did that? We also meet a group of supposed teens who work at a local restaurant, all are dressed for the Hallow-een holiday. This group of of costumed stereotypes, of course decide to go to the horror funhouse. This is where the fun really begins, with comedic and gory deaths. As the story goes on we see characters killed off one by one. One of the most entertaining is the slut girl dressed as a sexy Hilary Clinton, but looks more like Marylin Monroe. She ul-timately gets into a fight with clown girl in the public bathroom which actually turns out to be the best scene in the whole film. Ultimately the story goes on and there becomes a shift in dynamic when the victims become the warriors and start to kill the serial killers with help from the sherif (who has a strange connection to Mental Manny) and the dep-uty, who is amazingly clumsy but magically becomes a badass at the very end.

Personally the plot idea is wonderful, but the writing and some of the acting really ruined this film for me. It lacked a sense of believability which is sad because if it were done the right way, this film could have become a classic horror film. Also the film was very misleading with the actor credits, Robert England was only in the film for all of 5 minutes. The serial killers in the movie were very diverse, but the clown faced super monster beast guy really lacked the fear the others exhibited. He was on his own level of killer that it kind of took away from the enjoyment. THE FUN HOUSE MASSACRE, was a Fun House Flop.


The Package and Video

The Packaging was very deceiving, in a standard blu-ray hardcore, the graphic on front depicted more of a clown story. Which would have made for a better movie, if the massacre was due to one individual. Also as stated earlier the actor credit was deceitful in the sense that your expecting to see main billed people throughout majority of the film, which was not the case. Video quality was very well done, camera shots and the gory effects were of great quality. Often times the gore and death scenes provided co-medic relief to a dull horror film. Overall the video was 90 minutes in length and was shown in 1080p- high definition widescreen format.


The Audio

Audio was in ENGLISH DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1. For those of you like me who do not understand what that means, all I can say was that the audio was clear and I es-pecially loved the sound effects. Dialogue was easy to follow. The one thing I would change though would be the music. If it had an original score it may have added to the story, but the rock music was just predictable.


Special Features And Extras

Special Features included Audio Commentary with the director which was just the replaying of the entire film basically, cast video diaries which was the behind the scenes view which looked like found footage, and the theatrical trailer. Other extras was a pod-cast with a few of the actors, and some more behind the scenes footage. This Blu-Ray also had the options for English subtitles.



THE FUNHOUSE MASSACRE was a huge disappointment. While many horror fans love gore, the story was lost in poor writing, and failed campy humor. I hope some-one revisits this plot line in the future because the story is perfect given the right budget and cast. Also it would be better in this type of story to have less visual gore and more mental thrill. If it would have highlighted more on the sounds and the environment maybe it could of captured the horror better. Another thing, I wish they would of made better use of Robert Englund, this man is a horror legend and to have had him die in the first five minutes was just an injustice. Sort of like the last Halloween movie with Jamie Lee Curtis.


The Review
The Movie (4/10)
The Package and Video (7/10)
The Audio (7/10)
Special Features And Extras (4/10)
Overall (5/10)